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Here’s the breakdown: What Guys Think Of You: You're a girl in a major city.

You go to brunch with your girls and share screenshots of horrible Bumble conversations.

Hopefully there isn’t a group of angry dudes with brass knuckles waiting to beat me up outside of this library I write at.

We can swipe during every poop until we find a girl who will meet up late night.

Since the girls have to message us, it cuts down the time from swipe to vagina.

These questions about dating apps give guys way too much credit.

And the girls who want to maybe have sex literally come up to you and say, “OOHH ME! ” Guys generally don’t like the apps that limit that ability to get likes and matches and ego boosts, but those are the apps a girl should join if they want a boyfriend.

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